My children say this to each other all the time. It drives me totally crazy and I really don’t like it. I’ve told them to stop, I’ve asked them to be nicer and I’ve explained to them how serious the word hate is and that shouldn’t use it unless you really mean it.

That’s the bit that really gets me though. As much as they say it and fight and fight (and they won’t stop fighting) they will not leave each other alone. I’ve been trying to get them to change their attitude towards each other but maybe I should be trying to teach them to change their situation.

This came to me the other day because I was in a situation where I was interacting with someone I don’t like. I don’t know why I don’t, I’ve just not taken to them and it makes me really frustrated. I’m not going to go into detail but it’s unlikely my feelings are going to change, therefore I need to influence the only other factor I can- the situation.

Now, if this were Dynasty or Dallas I’d deal with the problem ‘permanently’ (said whilst twirling my villainous moustache) but it’s not and I don’t have a ‘tashe. So I had to think about what I could change- I came up with a list of environmental variables that I could influence that would make things better and it reminded me that there’s always a solution.

It’s about changing my attitude towards something and looking for a way to solve it (rather than being grumpy and frustrated!)

Now wish me luck as I bore my children rigid trying to explain such an adult concept.